Father-Son bonding

As a kid I used to like things that could fly. Example superman, batman, spider-man, aeroplane etc. I would throw all the things that I got in hand, up in the air *just* to see whether those would fly or not.

Dear Toastmasters, guests, how many of you liked as a kid the things that could fly? Raise your… whole body from the ground.

I am not going to talk about flying. I am going to talk about the bond that I shared with my father at the age when flying fascinated me.

First, I have to tell you the truth.
My father and I shared nothing in common. NOTHING! For example.
He liked our cat. But I liked flying cat.
He liked my little brother. But I liked flying little brother.
He liked my mother. But I liked flying mother (Though she was too heavy to lift for my size).

Though we shared nothing in common, still I liked my dad very much. I wouldn’t spend even a minute away from him.
At a time like that, I happened to go to school for the first time ever, for LKG. My dad took me to the school. Dropped me there.
“Dad, are you selling me?” I asked.
“No son. This is school. This is where you will develop your knowledge. School helps you get a good name in the future.”

I would start going up stairs. I would put my leg on the first step, turn around, and say, appa ta ta.
“Ta ta son”.
Then I would put my leg on the 2nd step, turn around, and say appa ta ta.
“Ta ta son”
Then I would put my leg on the 3rd step, turn around, and say appa ta ta.
My teacher would tell, if you tell, “appa ta ta” at each step, then by the time you reach the last step, you yourself would be old enough and be an appa. GO SOON!

With tears all overs my face, I entered the classroom for the first time.

My friends would bully me. They would say, “Hey Appa ta ta, come here. Appa ta ta, open your book”.
That surprised me. Because what my dad told that morning came true within an hour. Yes, this is school. And this helps me get a “good name”. Moreover, I got good name even before I developed my knowledge

Everyday, my father would walk up to the school to drop me and pick me up.

Transportation was little difficult 20 years ago:
My father didn’t have a car.
He didn’t have a bike.
He didn’t have enough money to afford a taxi.
What he did have was, his legs.
And what I did have was, his shoulders.

He would carry me on his shoulders wherever we went.

Hey dad, do more exercises for shoulders.

Hey dad, do more exercises for shoulders.

One day, we all went to the movies and after it was over, we were walking back home. Sorry, my dad, my mom, and my little brother were walking. And I was showing directions to my dad from his shoulders. “Go straight. Walk for 200 metres. Take the first left. Stop by the lollipop shop that’s on the left. The guy on your shoulders needs one.”

At some point, he got tired and let me down and asked me to walk.
If there was something that I hated more than walking, that was walking without a lollipop. I walked. I walked with grudge in my heart. “You let me walk, right? See. When I become old, “I will not buy you even one lollipop”.

After reaching home, I decided to stage a drama. It was dinner time and my mom called me to have dinner.
I went, took the plate in my hand, and then the next second, I enjoyed the scene of flying plate.
At that time, my brother started shouting, “why on earth did you throw my plate?”
My father looked at me angrily, “why are you doing this?”
I said, “Let’s go back to the place where you dropped me down and carry me back home from there.”
“Ok. Eat dinner. Then let’s go”.
*I looked at his plate and looked up.*
*I looked at his plate and looked up again*
“Ok ok. Let’s go,” he said.
“Wait wait. Not like this. Wear the same shirt that you wore that time”.

He did. And carried me back home from the place where he left.

Like this, I was very close to my father at my very young age. But as years passed, the gap between us started widening too. Nowadays, all we discuss when we are together is silence.

I grew up. I completed high school. I completed college. And after so many years, I said “appa ta ta” again to my dad. That felt good. That was right after the job interview and when I got placed in a Tata company. I phoned him and said, “Appa, Tata”.

I moved away from my home town for my job. But I was still working within India. I worked for couple of years.
And 3 years ago, I got a chance to move to the Netherlands from India. I was little sad that I had to move miles away from my father. When I told him about it, he said, “Wow! Nice! After all, I like flying son.”

Humor Monologue delivered at Toastmasters meeting – July 23, 2014

Read the set-up below and then read the humor monologue.

THE SET-UP (What was said and what happened during the meeting before the monologue was delivered)

1. There were 2 guests – Namrata and Preethi. Namrata introduced herself as a communication specialist by profession.

2. Nicole was the toastmaster of the evening. She was also the grammarian. This was her second time as toastmaster of the evening. She was the only lady club member present at the meeting.

3. I said that when I was a kid I was fascinated by flying objects or human. Like aeroplane, superman etc.

4. Tobias, during his speech, talked about bargaining skills. When the shop keeper says 150 Euros, he would start from 5 Euros bargaining. He completed his 10th speech today. So he got the “Competent Communicator Pin” from the president.

5. Tobias had a hooded jacket with him.

6. Tobias also talked about persuading skills. Don’t talk from the other end of the party (i.e. facing the party). Go sit near the party (person) so that he will feel that you are on his side.

7. Richard said the reason why Dutch team didn’t win the football World Cup. He said that they used all their luck in the initial matches itself.

8. Bogdan was Tobias’ speech evaluator. He said that Tobias created nice mental pictures in audience’s mind. He said, “When Tobias talked about Italy, I was there. When he talked about bargaining, I was there. When he talked about everything, I was there.”

9. Bogdan table topic was “What if you are second Picasso”. During his speech, he said that he doesn’t want to be the second Picasso. Rather he wants to be first Bogdan.

10. Chris said that tennis is for playing. And football is for watching.

The Humor Monologue

1. Dear Namrata and the people who are not communication specialists by profession.

2. It’s always good to see faces like Namrata and Preethi. It helps increase the ladies count for the meeting.

3. If I were a kid, I would have loved the Dutch football team. You know why? Because of Rob van Persie, the ‘flying’ Dutch man.

4. I was driving my car at 150 kms/hr. A cop stopped me. He said, “Pull over, please”. I took Tobias’ hooded jacket and gave to the cop and said, “Here, sir. Pull over”. (Pull over is another word for hooded jacket)

5. He asked me, “Why did you go at 150 km/hr?” I said, “No, I didn’t. I only went at 5 km/hr”. Then he said, “No no. 145 km/hr”. I said, “No, 10 km/hr”. He said, “140 km/hr”. Then I said, “Ok. Final speed. 15 km/hr”.

6. That bargaining trick didn’t work out. So, I got out of the car and went besides him, put my hand on his shoulders, “Sir, look at that speedometer. Moreover, we are on the same side.”

7. I still couldn’t persuade him. Maybe I used all my luck with another police who stopped me 10 minutes ago.

8. When the first police pulled me over, Bogdan was with me. When this police pulled over, Bogdan was with me. Bogdan was with me everywhere.

9. Tobias has a big problem. He now has a stalker, in the form of Bogdan.

10. On that day, I was stopped by 9 cops. The 9th cop said, “If you are stopped by the next cop, don’t forget to collect your ‘Competent Rash Driver’ pin”.

11. Nicole said, “I don’t want to be the second-time toastmaster. Rather I want to be the first-time grammarian.”

12. Tennis is for playing. And football is for watching?? I thought that football is for drinking beer (because in the Netherlands, football watching is always associated with drinking beer).

Humor Monologue delivered at Toastmasters meeting – June 25, 2014

Read the set-up below and then read the humor monologue.

THE SET-UP (What was said and what happened during the meeting before the monologue was delivered)

1. Theme of the meeting was ‘soccer’. And word of the day was ‘offside’.

2. Rohit, Mark, Bieneke, Sjana, and Tobias were sitting facing the dais. Others were sitting sideways on both sides of the dais.

3. Marc told about the time when he went to France. And when he was about to return to the Netherlands, there was a strike going on and no flights were operating for 1 week.

4. Wilhelm told that soccer players get paid too much.

5. Chris was asked a question, “How to beat a formidable opponent?” Chris, during his speech, said that everywhere they call it soccer, but in England they call it football.

6. June is the year end for Toastmasters. And Bogdan is the new president of our club from July.

7. Tobias’ project was to persuade the audience. He drew a pie chart on the board with 7%, 38%, 55% pieces. He told 7% of content, 38% of tone intonation, 55% body language matters for a great speech.

8. Tobias’ speech evaluator Nicole told that his speech wasn’t persuasive enough.

9. Tobias said that when you’re at a bill counter, make that person smile and make that person say, “This person changed my day”.

10. Bogdan’s speech title was “Man’s search for meaning”. His speech evaluator told that his voice was nice this time.

11. Bogdan talked about situations where you miss something in the last minute. e.g. you run to the train station and climb the stairs and finally miss the train just after it shuts the door. He asked the audience, “Do you know what I’m talking about?”.

12. Wilhelm said that Dutch women won world hockey championship. Still, hockey is not popular. Soccer only is popular.

The Humor Monologue
1. Hello Rohit, Mark, Bieneke, Sjana, Tobias, and the people on offside.

2. Today’s theme is soccer. Seems we’re rightly following it. I mean we completed the meeting in 90 minutes. With 3 minutes extra time.

3. Tobias said, “Make a person smile in 30 seconds”. That’s exactly why I’m here. C’mon. Make me smile in 30 seconds.

4. Spain, England, Italy made early exit in World Cup football, so that they can be on time in the train station before the door shuts.

5. They exactly know what Bogdan was talking about.

6. How to beat a formidable opponent? Bite the opponent players.

7. Yesterday, Suarez, a player from Uruguay, bit an Italian defender on shoulders. Football is a dangerous game. You may even die. Hey Wilhelm, now you know why they get paid too much.

8. *showed the pie chart on the board* Look here. It’s a pizza. 55% is a piece normally eaten by a normal American. 38% piece is eaten by an American in diet. And the 7% piece is eaten by an American who is dead.

9. Tobias, to persuade the audience, you could’ve said, “If you do what I say, I’ll give you the 55% pizza piece.”

10. To avoid the strike in France, France football team flew to Brazil 3 years ago.

11. Everywhere they call is soccer. In England, they call it football. In India, we call it “some-90-minute-ball-kicking-game”.

12. If I were a boss, I would change my employees’ shifts from Thursday, Friday to Saturday and Sunday. Then they will say, “This person changed my day”.

13. Bogdan’s voice was nice this time. So, he should step down as president. And become voice-president.

14. Man’s search for meaning. Whereas women have won the hockey championship.


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