Humor Monologue delivered in a workshop at Toastmasters Division Conference – October 25, 2014

I just prepared this monologue, and there was no time to deliver it.
Read the set-up below and then read the humor monologue.

THE SET-UP (What was said and what happened during the meeting before the monologue was delivered)

1. Bill gave a workshop on vocal variety. He said when he receives a phone call, he attends the call, practices his voice a bit by doing breathing exercise for 3 seconds and starts talking.

2. Bill said “Tone, Pitch, Volume, Pace” help vocal variety. He made weird sounds, like a fox, dog, lion etc to explain vocal variety.

3. Robert gave a workshop on sales. He intentionally dropped his phone and said, “See, you will need insurance for your phone for situations like this.

4. Robert said humor can be an icebreaker with the customer. When the customer says, “Just looking around”, joke like “The shop is rectangular (not circular)” might bring laugh.

5. Robert’s handwriting was very bad on the whiteboard.

Humor Monologue
1. Do you all have health insurance. Because my speech is injurious to health. If you want me to speak, first buy this insurance.

2. Hey Robert, when I speak, the words fall down. Do I need insurance for that?

3. Once I called Bill on his phone. I heard his voice after 3 hours. He was exercising.

4. I thought that his dog picked up the phone. The first 10 minutes, I kept hearing bow bow bow sound.

5. If a customer comes to your shop, to break the ice, you can say something like this. “Hello sir. Good morning. Are you here to buy this shop?”

6. Dropping the call is good. Dropping the cell isn’t.

7. Robert dropped his phone because on the other side, it was Bill. Robert dropped the phone when Bill started talking at volume 1000.

8. Robert, I have something to sell to you. This pen… will make your handwriting perfect. Moreover, you can look around. Because it’s cylindrical.

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