Humor Monologue delivered at Toastmasters meeting – May 27, 2015

Read the set-up below and then read the humor monologue.

THE SET-UP (What was said and what happened during the meeting before the monologue was delivered)

1. In the agenda, after every speaker, there was an agenda item named “Quiet evaluation of speech” during which the audience have to write down some feedback for the speaker. Floris, the host, forgot this and invited the 2nd speaker as soon as the 1st speaker finished. Later he remembered this for the 2nd 3rd and 4th speakers and asked the audience to write down feedback.

2. Philip, a guest, visited our club after 2 years. He said he is moving to China soon, so he can’t come anymore to our club. Floris said there are Toastmasters club in China too and he can join one. Philip wondered, “Oh, China has too?!”

3. Winslow is the new VP of Public Relation. He said that his goal is to bring 100 guests to our meetings over the next year.

4. Floris, the host, announced during the break that everyone gets a complementary drink.

5. Winslow said that when he was young, he needed glasses. To read clearly.

6. One of the table-topics was “Why shouldn’t you go to gym?”

7. Word of the day at the last meeting was “Progress”. It was written in a moving board which was kept at the back of the room. We weren’t using that board at today’s meeting. We used another one which was closer to us.

8. Justina evaluated my speech and she mentioned there was no structure in it.

The Humor Monologue

1. Floris, after the 2nd 3rd and 4th speakers, did the right thing. i.e. “quite evaluation of speech”. But after the 1st speaker, he “quit evaluation of speech”.

2. Philip, good to see you after 2 years. Hope to see you again… in 2 years.

3. Winslow, I have a tip for you to have many guests. Publish that we offer one complementary drink. We’ll have 1000 Indians… every meeting.

4. When I was young, I needed glasses [shows the audience a beer bottle]

5. My speech has no structure. To get some structure, it’s time I sent my speech to a gym.

6. Toastmasters are everywhere. They are even in China. No word yet from the toastmasters in Bermuda triangle.

7. It’s time this board [points to the board in the back of the room where “progress” is written] made some progress and moved forward.


4 responses

  1. Nice job on the monologue. Do you find that it gets easier the more you do it?

  2. John, thanks. Yes, it gets easier the more I do it. But when I have some additional roles, it’s harder to come up with more lines than when I don’t have an additional role. During this meeting, I had a speaker role. Somehow when I give a speech, I forget to use lines from my own speech as setup for monologue jokes. I never link my speech lines with other speeches. So, I lose a major portion of the meeting in my monologue. That’s something I’ll have to improve.

  3. It’s difficult to split your focus. My preference is to not have another role in the meeting. You need to be totally focused in order to do an excellent monologue.

    1. Yeah, I completely agree with you, John. Two meetings ago, I was watching cricket scores on my mobile while preparing monologue. Eventually I gave up writing monologue since I didn’t have any good line. Audience were disappointed that day.

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