Humor Monologue delivered at Toastmasters meeting – January 27, 2016

Here is another Observational Humor monologue which was presented at the end of a Toastmasters meeting. First you’ll be able to read the set-up for each joke. Then I’ll share the joke. Next I’ll briefly comment on what made the joke work. Although the examples of Observational Humor are in the context of a Toastmasters meeting, the skills apply just the same to any meeting you might be attending. It’s a useful skill to develop. When you can drop in an observational line into any presentation it makes the content of your whole talk feel fresh and original.

THE SET-UP (What happened and what was said during the meeting before the monologue was presented)

1. Winslow said that innovation is all around us.

2. Shane said that he’s afraid of speaking in public. He said he would try to control himself while he speaks… and when he gets nervous, the ground would swallow him.

3. Mike talked about surviving after a plane crash. He said, “Eat sea cucumber. Drink own urine if needed.”

4. Pauline said she likes breaking things.

5. One of the table topics was “How to get world peace”. Another table topic was “What’s the headlines tomorrow?”

6. Winslow asked the audience to raise hands if we had New Year resolution.

7. Winslow said he blushes only when in public, not when he is alone.

8. The light used by the timer (me) stopped working for 5 minutes.

9. Floris said that a guy built the model for “Gugenheim Bilbao” museum just using paper. That was an amazing innovation.

10. Fabi pointed out the mishap that happened during the Miss Universe contest. A contestant from Columbia was mistakenly crowned Miss Universe for 2 minutes. And then later taken back.

11. Three table topics speakers finishd their speeches in 1.35 minutes. When I reported that, the audience laughed.

12. The 3rd speaker Anna was absent.

13. Word of the day was pundit (a person who makes comments or judgement)

The Humor Monologue
1. Dear Toastmasters, guests, and Mr. Innovation. Because Innovation is all around us, no.
(Weakest line of the monologue)

2. The 3rd speaker Anna is not here. The ground swallowed her.
(A callback to ground swallowing someone. Decent laughter)

3. When I speak, I control myself. I mean, I ‘con’ myself. And I ‘troll’ myself.
(Wordplay. Self deprecation. I had to pause a little longer for this joke to work)

4. During the break, some people drank beer, some drank coke. I drank my own urine.
(Self deprecation. Again, I had to pause a little longer for the laughter to come)

5. Pauline likes breaking things. So, give her the world, and we will get world peace. And I am a PUNdit.
(Word play. With the topper as the word of the day)

6. Pauline, you are going to love your first speech – The ice BREAKER.
(Again wordplay)

7. It’s no wonder when Rens invited Pauline to stage for evaluating Mike’s speech, he said, “Give your PIECE of evaluation.”
(Series of wordplay jokes)

8. I didn’t raise hands when Winslow asked if someone has New Year resolution, because my resolution is “Not to raise hands”. So far so good.
(Absurdity. Just tried to come up with a silly excuse for why I don’t have a resolution. And topper “so far so good” from the joke “I aim to live forever”.)

9. I would’ve failed if Winslow had asked “Who wants to have free food?”
(Self deprecation that I’m always ready to eat free food)

10. Tomorrow’s headlines is going to read, “Mr. India, Bala, after being crowned, ran away from the auditorium… within 2 minutes”.
(Paints a funny picture. Implying that they wrongly crowned me as Mr. India and I wanted to keep the crown, so I ran away).

11. Winslow, when you are the ONLY survivor of a plane crash, don’t worry. Look on the bright side. You won’t blush.
(Truth)

12. The light, for a moment, didn’t work. I was thinking of alternatives.
For green -> Sea cucumber
For amber -> A Dutchman (since Dutch wear orange dress)
For red -> Blushing Winslow
(Recall to blushing winslow. Follows the pattern of three)

13. When the guy built “Gugenheim Bilbao” museum using paper, a lot of people looked at it and wondered, “IT’S UNBELIEVABLE… AND FUNNY TOO. Mr. India ran away from the auditorium???”
(Recall to Mr. India joke. Museum made of paper – what paper it could be? Used the option – the paper where the headlines was about me)

14. Going by tonight’s trend, I am finishing my speech in 1 minute and 35 seconds.
(Recall to a funny fact. Nice closer)

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