Humor Monologue delivered at Toastmasters meeting – March 29, 2017

Here is another Observational Humor monologue presented at the end of a meeting. We’ll tell you what was said and what happened during the meeting before the monologue was presented.

THE SET-UP. We will give you enough background to help you understand the jokes.
1. At our club, we have a role called “Tastemaster”, who brings snacks for everyone. At tonight’s meeting, we had 3 people getting snacks.

2. Before the meeting started, the emcee asked, “Does anyone want water?”

3. Karin, one of the guests, told that she failed an audition of a show. She wanted to improve her speaking skills, so she came to Toastmasters.

4. Winslow said a funny incident. It was when his son was 5 (now he’s 24). They were in Disneyland, having dinner. His son dipped his face in spaghetti, and everyone in the restaurant was shocked. He also said that it’s hard to send kids to bed early and have some fun.

5. Tom, a third time guest, said that he is now ready to give us the money (meaning that he is going to join the club)

6. Jasmin, a speaker, told a story from a German book (she also showed us the book). The person in the story travelled Asia in elephant, bikes, and boats.

7. The table topics master asked everyone, “Who here has children?”

The Humor Monologue
1. Good evening everyone, and the one person who’s not a tastemaster.
(Exaggeration. There were many tastemasters)

2. Does anyone want rotten tomatoes, before I start… to throw at me?
(Self deprecation. Callback to the emcee asking for water.)

3. I’m going to tell my jokes from this book [shows the audience that German book]. Oh wait, it’s a GERMAN book.
(Universal humor. i.e. Germans don’t have sense of humor)

4. Karin, you’re welcome to join our club, after you pass the audition.
(Being silly)

5. Who here doesn’t have children? [some TMs raise hands] Anyone wants to adopt me?
(Absurdity. Best line of the monologue)

6. I promise I’ll go to bed early.
(Topper to the last joke. Absurdity once again)

7. Winslow didn’t remove the sphagetti from his son’s face, so that his son can’t see anything, and Winslow can have fun.
(Paints a funny picture. Asked myself a question, if your kid is not going to bed early, how can you still have fun? The answer is if he can’t see anything.)

8. Everyone was shocked, not because his son had sphagetti on his face, but because he had it on his face for 3 days.
(Giving another definition to shocked.)

9. Now he’s 24. And he still has it.

10. I’m a professional speaker. People hire me to give motivational speeches to their children, and put them to sleep early.
(Self deprecation. Unexpected punchline – when I say I give motivational speech to children, the audience expect, it’s to turn them into great people. The punchine reveals it’s to put them to sleep early.)

11. Tom, it’s 500 euros for one kid. Give me all your money.
(Callback to Tom saying that he would give his money now)

12. Safe travel back home, especially if you’re by elephant.
(Callback to the German travelling by elephant)


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